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Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

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sibling is a great way <strong>to</strong> enjoy each other’s company. Often siblings find things completely hilarious that<br />

outsiders may not understand because of the unique nature of sibling relationships. Siblings also can<br />

lovingly make fun of each other. Now, we’re not talking about making fun of someone in a demeaning<br />

or mean-spirited manner. For example, one of our coauthors has an older brother who loves <strong>to</strong> give him<br />

a hard time. Recently, our coauthor misspelled something on Facebook, and his brother was right there<br />

<strong>to</strong> point it out and give him a hard time. In some relationships, this could be viewed as criticism, but<br />

because of the nature of their relationship, our coauthor knew the incident should be taken in jest.<br />

<br />

The third way siblings engage in relational maintenances is through social support. Social support is an<br />

individual’s perception and the actuality that an individual is loved and cared for and has people he/she/<br />

they can turn <strong>to</strong> when assistance or help is needed. Between siblings, this could involve conversations<br />

about one’s romantic life or even about parental concerns. Another way that siblings often provide social<br />

support is by giving and seeking advice from her/his/their sibling(s).<br />

<br />

The fourth way that families engage in social support is through family events. Not all families are big<br />

on family events, but some families participate in close-knit gatherings regularly. Some siblings will avoid<br />

these events <strong>to</strong> avoid seeing their other siblings, but many siblings see these opportunities as a way <strong>to</strong><br />

keep their sibling relationships going. One of our coauthor’s family has problems getting <strong>to</strong>gether each<br />

year during the holidays because of how busy their schedules are in December. Instead, our coauthor<br />

and family go on family trips. Over the years, they’ve gone <strong>to</strong> Australia, Alaska, Hawaii, The Bahamas,<br />

San Francisco, New York City, New Zealand, and many other places. Currently, they’re planning trips<br />

<strong>to</strong> Belize and back <strong>to</strong> Hawaii. The family looks forward <strong>to</strong> these vacations <strong>to</strong>gether. In addition <strong>to</strong> these<br />

trips, our coauthor’s father also arranges periodic family reunions for his side of the family. Our coauthor<br />

and their sibling often end up rooming <strong>to</strong>gether because both are single. Ultimately, both look forward <strong>to</strong><br />

these reunions because it gives them a chance <strong>to</strong> catch up.<br />

<br />

It’s often great <strong>to</strong> attend family events, but we usually only like <strong>to</strong> attend when we know our sibling will be<br />

there. In these cases, we often use our siblings as a form of escape. In fact, some siblings will only attend<br />

family get-<strong>to</strong>gethers when they know their sibling(s) will be there. We often have a range of reasons for<br />

why we need <strong>to</strong> escape when we’re interacting with our family, but we are sure glad our sibling(s) are<br />

there when we need that escape.<br />

Verbal Aggression<br />

The final relational maintenance strategy that siblings have been found <strong>to</strong> use is verbal aggression.<br />

Verbal aggression is generally not viewed as a positive <strong>to</strong>ol for communication. However, some sibling<br />

pairs have realized over time that verbally aggressive behavior allows them <strong>to</strong> get their way or vent their<br />

frustrations. However, in the original study by Weber and Myers, the researchers did find that all of the<br />

other relational maintenance strategies were positively related <strong>to</strong> sibling liking, commitment, and trust,<br />

but verbal aggression was not. 57<br />

389<br />

<strong>Interpersonal</strong> <strong>Communication</strong>

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