Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

ferent perceptions. The same thing can
happen when you don’t place a comma
in the right place. The comma can make
a big difference in how people understand
a message.
A great example of how syntactic
rules is the Star Wars character, Yoda,
who often speaks with different rules.
He has said, “Named must be your fear
before banish it you can” and “Happens
to every guy sometimes this does.”
This example illustrates that syntactic
rules can vary based on culture or
background.
Another example is Figure 4.1. In
this case, we learn the importance that a
comma can make in written in language.
In the first instance, “Let’s eat grandma!”
is quite different than the second one,
“Let’s eat, grandma!” The first implies
cannibalism and the second a family
dinner. As the image says, punctuation
saves lives.
Let's Eat Grandma!
What!?
Let's eat, Grandma!
Punctuation Saves Lives.
Figure 4.1 Commas Matter
Third, pragmatic rules help us interpret messages by analyzing the interaction completely. We need to
consider the words used, how they are stated, our relationship with the speaker, and the objectives of
our communication. For instance, the words “I want to see you now” would mean different things if the
speaker was your boss versus your lover. One could be a positive connotation, and another might be a
negative one. The same holds true for humor. If we know that the other person understands and appreciates
sarcasm, we might be more likely to engage in that behavior and perceive it differently from someone
who takes every word literally.
Most pragmatic rules are based on culture and experience. For instance, the term “Netflix and chill”
often means that two people will hook up. Imagine someone from a different country who did not know
what this meant; they would be shocked if they thought they were going to watch Netflix with the other
person and just relax. Another example would be “Want to have a drink?”, which usually infers an
alcoholic beverage. Another way of saying this might be to say, “Would you like something to drink?”
The second sentence does not imply that the drink has to contain alcohol.
It is common for people to text in capital letters when they are angry or excited. You would interpret
the text differently if the text was not in capital letters. For instance, “I love you” might be perceived
differently from “I LOVE YOU!!!” Thus, when communicating with others, you should also realize that
pragmatic rules can impact the message.
Words Create Reality
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Interpersonal Communication