Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

of learning are able to share perceptions of the world which influences their beliefs, values, norms, and
rules, which eventually affect behavior.” 4 Let’s break down this definition. First, when we talk about
“culture,” we are starting off with a group of people. One of the biggest misunderstandings new people
studying culture have is that an individual can have their own personalized culture. Culture is something
that is formed by the groups that we grow up in and are involved with through our lifetimes.
Second, we learn about our culture. In fact, culture becomes such an ingrained part of who we are
that we often do not even recognize our own culture and how our own culture affects us daily. Just like
language, everyone is hardwired to learn culture. What culture we pick up is ultimately a matter of the
group(s) we are born into and raised. Just like a baby born to an English-speaking family isn’t going to
magically start speaking French out of nowhere, neither will a person from one culture adopt another
culture accidentally.
Third, what we learn ultimately leads to a shared perception of the world. All cultures have stories
that are taught to children that impact how they view the world. If you are raised by Jewish or Christian
parents/guardians, you will learn the creation story in the Bible. However, this is only one of many
different creation myths that have abounded over time in different cultures:
The Akamba in Kenya say that the first two people were lowered to earth by God on a cloud.
In ancient Babylon and Sumeria, the gods slaughtered another god named We-ila, and out of his
blood and clay, they formed humans.
One myth among the Tibetan people is that they owe their existence to the union of an ogress, not
of this world, and a monkey on Gangpo Ri Mountain at Tsetang.
And the Aboriginal tribes in Australia believe that humans are just the decedents of gods. 5
Ultimately, which creation story we grew up with was a matter of the culture in which we were raised.
These different myths lead to very different views of the individual’s relationship with both the world and
with their God, gods, or goddesses.
Fourth, the culture we are raised in will teach us our beliefs, values, norms, and rules. are
assumptions and convictions held by an individual, group, or culture about the truth or existence of
something. For example, in all of the creation myths discussed in the previous paragraph, these are
beliefs that were held by many people at various times in human history. Next, we have , or
important and lasting principles or standards held by a culture about desirable and appropriate courses
of action or outcomes. This definition is a bit complex, so let’s break it down. When looking at this
definition, it’s important first to highlight that different cultures have different perceptions related to both
courses of action or outcomes. For example, in many cultures throughout history, martyrdom (dying for
one’s cause) has been something deeply valued. As such, in those cultures, putting one’s self in harm’s
way (course of action) or dying (outcome) would be seen as both desirable and appropriate. Within a
given culture, there are generally guiding principles and standards that help determine what is desirable
and appropriate. In fact, many religious texts describe martyrdom as a holy calling. So, within these
cultures, martyrdom is something that is valued. Next, within the definition of culture are the concepts
of norms and rules. are informal guidelines about what is acceptable or proper social behavior
within a specific culture., on the other hand, are the explicit guidelines (generally written down)
that govern acceptable or proper social behavior within a specific culture. With rules, we have clearly
concrete and explicitly communicated ways of behaving, whereas norms are generally not concrete, nor
are they explicitly communicated. We generally do not know a norm exists within a given culture unless
we violate the norm or watch someone else violating the norm. The final part of the definition of culture,
and probably the most important for our purposes, looking at interpersonal communication, is that these
beliefs, values, norms, and rules will govern how people behave.
Interpersonal Communication 192