Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

106 LEADING WITH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
8. REAPPRAISAL
Reappraisal is a technique drawn from psychotherapy and
cognitive restructuring where you give an experience or situation
a new, different, and more constructive meaning. This helps
bring in the prefrontal cortex functions and releases the grip of
the amygdala hijack. The questioning process “lights up” executive
functioning like the questions of the Emotional Audit. If you fi nd
yourself with distressing emotions, you can ask yourself questions
like the following:
• What can I learn from this?
• How can I turn this into a meaningful experience for me?
• What would I tell someone else to do in this situation?
• Is what I am telling myself about this really true?
• What evidence is there to support my interpretation of this
event?
• What are two or three other interpretations that could be
more accurate?
• What is the best thing for me to do right now?
QUESTIONS AND ACTION APPLICATIONS
• Which questions work the best for you to help change
the situation?
• What patterns do you see emerging with your emotions?
• What is your most common emotion?
• Do your interpretations of situations get better after the
initial one?
STAR PERFORMER ACTION PLAN
Read through the Fallen Stars examples and Coach’s Corner to
develop your Emotional Self-Control skills. Now, answer the following
questions to help you make your plan. Remember, microinitiatives
can make a macro impact.