Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

COMMUNICATION AND EMPATHY TOOLS AND STRATEGIES 277
• As a leader, take time to truly prepare what and how you are
going to communicate your points.
• Get feedback from your team about your effectiveness in
delivering messages.
5. POWER OF LANGUAGE: METAPHORS, STORIES,
AND WORDS
How a leader uses language is critical to effective communication.
The choice of metaphors, stories, words, and visual pictures separates
the Star communicator from the average. As Mark Twain said,
“The difference between the right word and almost the right word
is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.”
People remember a metaphor or story more than any other form
of communication. Tune in to utilizing these two communication
strategies and you will successfully hit the communication target
with your direct reports.
METAPHORS
A metaphor is defined as a mental bridge that links the unknown
with the known, describing one thing in terms of another. 8 When
someone says, “X is like Y” a metaphor usually follows. For example:
“My boss’s feedback feels like a two-by-four against my head.”
“The culture here is like everyone is breathing in lattes.”
“Great leaders and managers treat their direct reports like
chess players rather than checkers.”
“Star communicators fi ne-tune their delivery like an
archer spending extra seconds aiming to ensure he hits the
bull’s-eye.”
It is important to train your ears to recognize people’s metaphors
and then incorporate these metaphors into your responses.
Using your followers’ metaphors will help them know they have
been heard and honored. People have a special relationship with