Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

COMMUNICATION AND EMPATHY TOOLS AND STRATEGIES 297
• Work on and practice your inquiry skills.
• Evaluate the team meeting’s effectiveness. (See Team Meetings
in Chapter 4, page 162.)
10. THE LEFT-HAND COLUMN
This is another strategy, introduced by Senge in The Fifth
Discipline, to illuminate our mental models. On a single piece of
paper, draw one line down the middle. On the right-hand side, title
the column “WHAT WAS SAID.” Fill in the column with the actual
dialogue of what was said in a recent conversation with a co-worker.
On the top of the left-hand column, write “WHAT WAS THOUGHT,
BUT NOT EXPRESSED” and fi ll in this column with thoughts you
had that were not spoken. The reason the left-hand column is not
expressed is usually because of trust issues or skill issues on how
to say what is difficult to another. So this becomes the fi rst step in
identifying what is in the left-hand column. The team can brainstorm
examples of how to best express the left-hand column.
LEFT-HAND COLUMN
What was thought,
but not expressed
RIGHT-HAND COLUMN
What was said
QUESTIONS AND ACTION APPLICATIONS
• Work with your team and choose one conversation that may
have caused some confl ict. Have people write the actual rightcolumn
conversation and then the left-hand column of what
was thought but not said. This can be done anonymously.
Then you can exchange or read people’s left-hand column.
Discuss how the left-hand column can be expressed in a
constructive manner. Use discretion depending on the level of
conflict and how blunt people are with their left-hand column.