Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

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INTRODUCTION 5 LEADERS’ CONSEQUENCES Leaders have less executive functioning brainpower operating or lower EQ and IQ going into solving the problems and therefore exhibit poorer leadership. There is more overwhelm, frustration, confusion, impatience, poor communication, blaming, and defensiveness. In the search to solve the problems, the brain becomes reductionist: “What is the problem?” becomes a search for “Who is the problem?” TEAM CONSEQUENCE Team members’ emotions may include feeling blamed, defensive, unacknowledged, and confused and the desire to avoid or withdraw from the process. This affects their engagement, morale, retention, and performance. Team EQ and IQ are decreased, and this result can then bring others down, as shown in Figure I.1. The dynamic shown in Figure I.1 occurs in almost every organization unless the leader is very aware, intentional, and disciplined. The way out of this loop is to enhance your Emotional Intelligence, being aware of your reactions and your team’s reactions and then modifying the plays or strategies as needed. Dan Siegel, a psychiatrist and neuroscience researcher, calls this skill mindsight, a combination of insight into yourself and empathy toward others. 5 We have all watched football coaches pacing the sidelines of an exciting game, avidly referring to their well-worn playbooks. Like most coaches in the world of sports, leaders * in business also need an official playbook to get out of the EQ, IQ Brain Drain Loop and provide just the right strategies to enhance their success and produce more wins. A playbook is a compilation of vital strategies developed to utilize each player’s unique capabilities and strengths. *The term leader is used in this book to describe a vast cross section of roles including but not limited to individual performers, managers, coaches, trainers, and consultants. “Leaders” are either leading themselves or others to maximize their potential and capabilities.
6 LEADING WITH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE FIGURE I.1 EQ, IQ BRAIN DRAIN LOOP ORGANIZATIONAL DAILY DYNAMICS Complexity, urgency, individual performance pressure (IPP) TEAM CLIMATE Defensive about being blamed, frustration, unsure of what to do, withdrawal or checking out, minimal engagement, spreading decreased EQ and IQ to others on the team OVERWHELM AND CHAOS LEADERS’ EQ AND IQ DECREASE POOR LEADERSHIP Confusion, impatience, frustration, lack of clarity and direction, blaming others, defensiveness, over- or under-managing
Page 2 and 3: PRAISE FOR LEADING WITH EMOTIONAL I
Page 4 and 5: “Leading with Emotional Intellige
Page 6 and 7: “Dr. Reldan Nadler has provided a
Page 8 and 9: LEADING WITH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
Page 10 and 11: This book is dedicated to Martin S.
Page 12 and 13: CONTENTS PREFACE ACKNOWLEDGMENTS IN
Page 14 and 15: CONTENTS xiii CHAPTER THREE: SELF-C
Page 16 and 17: CONTENTS xv Experiential Teambuildi
Page 18 and 19: CONTENTS xvii 3. White Space Issues
Page 20 and 21: PREFACE As a psychologist doing exe
Page 22 and 23: ACKNOWLEDGMENTS Iwould like to firs
Page 24 and 25: INTRODUCTION WHY EMOTIONAL INTELLIG
Page 26 and 27: INTRODUCTION 3 All of us have exper
Page 30 and 31: INTRODUCTION 7 Great leaders, like
Page 32 and 33: INTRODUCTION 9 ativity, and decisio
Page 34 and 35: INTRODUCTION 11 the Emotional Quoti
Page 36 and 37: INTRODUCTION 13 all point to the pa
Page 38 and 39: INTRODUCTION 15 ▲ What can I do a
Page 40 and 41: CHAPTER ONE ARE YOU A STAR PERFORME
Page 42 and 43: ARE YOU A STAR PERFORMER OR JUST AV
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ARE YOU A STAR PERFORMER OR JUST AV
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CHAPTER TWO EMOTIONAL SELF-CONTROL
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EMOTIONAL SELF-CONTROL TOOLS AND ST
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CHAPTER THREE SELF-CONFIDENCE TOOLS
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SELF-CONFIDENCE TOOLS AND STRATEGIE
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CHAPTER FOUR TEAMWORK AND COLLABORA
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TEAMWORK AND COLLABORATION TOOLS AN
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CHAPTER FIVE DEVELOPING OTHERS TOOL
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DEVELOPING OTHERS TOOLS AND STRATEG
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CHAPTER SIX COMMUNICATION AND EMPAT
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COMMUNICATION AND EMPATHY TOOLS AND
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CHAPTER SEVEN THE GAME PLAN Great l
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THE GAME PLAN 305 • Key executive
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THE GAME PLAN 307 4. Success Rules:
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THE GAME PLAN 309 10. Focus on Stre
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THE GAME PLAN 311 5. What will keep
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THE GAME PLAN 313 MONTH: YEAR: WEEK
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NOTES INTRODUCTION 1. W. Bennis,
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NOTES 317 24. M. Buffett and D. Cla
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NOTES 319 86. M. Buckingham, The On
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NOTES 321 CHAPTER FOUR 1. H. A. Elf
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BIBLIOGRAPHY Alexander, J. “From
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BIBLIOGRAPHY 325 Everts, D. “Carl
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BIBLIOGRAPHY 327 Maslow, A. Toward
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ADDITIONAL RESOURCES The following
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ADDITIONAL RESOURCES 331 EQ Univers
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INDEX Accountability and consequenc
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INDEX 335 Derailers of Bill Clinton
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INDEX 337 Le Doux, Joseph, 86 Leade
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INDEX 339 eight strategies for, 92-
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR Dr. Reldan S. Nadl
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HOW TO ENGAGE THE AUTHOR TO BRING E
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