Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

COMMUNICATION AND EMPATHY TOOLS AND STRATEGIES 259
WHAT IS THE EMPATHY COMPETENCY?
Empathy is the ability to 1) understand other people, and 2)
accurately hear the unspoken or partly expressed thoughts, feelings,
and concerns of others. It implies taking an active interest in other
people’s concerns. For people to believe you see their perspective,
you have to say their perspective.
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE RESEARCH EXAMPLES
Empathy requires self-awareness, as our sensitivity to others’
feelings derives from our ability to be aware and sensitive to our
own feelings.
Physicians who are better at recognizing emotions of patients
are more successful at treating them than their less sensitive counterparts.
5 Spencer and Spencer found the ability to read others’
needs appears to come naturally to the most successful managers of
product teams. Empathy was found to be effective for sales in small
and large retailers. 6 Empathy was also found to reduce stereotyping
that can cause anxiety and poorer performance by the stereotyped
individual. 7
Are You a Star Performer in empathy or just average? Do you
regularly and consistently (at least 80% of the time) understand
others’ perspectives and say their perspective fi rst, and are you
open to diversity?
HOW TO LISTEN
EXPRESSED AND UNEXPRESSED FEELINGS
The Star “sees others’ perspectives and understands them.” This
includes the content of what they are saying and the feelings they
are having. The content of what someone is saying is the easier of
the two. For someone to really feel heard, knowing how he or she
feels allows a deeper sense of being understood. This is challenging