Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Hands-On ... - always yours

INTRODUCTION 5
LEADERS’ CONSEQUENCES
Leaders have less executive functioning brainpower operating
or lower EQ and IQ going into solving the problems and therefore
exhibit poorer leadership. There is more overwhelm, frustration,
confusion, impatience, poor communication, blaming, and
defensiveness.
In the search to solve the problems, the brain becomes reductionist:
“What is the problem?” becomes a search for “Who is the
problem?”
TEAM CONSEQUENCE
Team members’ emotions may include feeling blamed, defensive,
unacknowledged, and confused and the desire to avoid or withdraw
from the process. This affects their engagement, morale, retention,
and performance. Team EQ and IQ are decreased, and this result
can then bring others down, as shown in Figure I.1.
The dynamic shown in Figure I.1 occurs in almost every organization
unless the leader is very aware, intentional, and disciplined.
The way out of this loop is to enhance your Emotional Intelligence,
being aware of your reactions and your team’s reactions and then
modifying the plays or strategies as needed. Dan Siegel, a psychiatrist
and neuroscience researcher, calls this skill mindsight, a combination
of insight into yourself and empathy toward others. 5
We have all watched football coaches pacing the sidelines of an
exciting game, avidly referring to their well-worn playbooks. Like
most coaches in the world of sports, leaders * in business also need
an official playbook to get out of the EQ, IQ Brain Drain Loop and
provide just the right strategies to enhance their success and produce
more wins. A playbook is a compilation of vital strategies developed
to utilize each player’s unique capabilities and strengths.
*The term leader is used in this book to describe a vast cross section of roles including
but not limited to individual performers, managers, coaches, trainers, and consultants.
“Leaders” are either leading themselves or others to maximize their potential and
capabilities.