12.Practice.Tests.for.the.SAT_2015-2016_1128p

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12 Practice Tests for the SAT Practice Test Eleven Answers and Explanations I 977 Answers and Explanations how the obstacle was turned to good effect in paragraph 2, and concludes with a fina!, highlighted example. These are discussed in a clear and convincing way. Vocabulary is also strong (buoyant, for example), and the essay demonstrates a good grasp of grammar and sentence structure. SECTION 1 6 Score Essay Every obstacle can be turned into an opportunity, if one has the right attitude or perspective. People with this attitude are buoyant, not easily discouraged, and welcome challenges and adversity. One personal example took place in sixth grade, when I broke my hand by falling off my bicycle. The doctor had to put it into a cast. The cast was a real obstacle. It was on my right hand, the one I write with. It looked like homework would be impossible! But I learned to type with one hand, and I did my English and social studies work on the typewriter. My mom helped me by writing out my math homework based on answers I gave her. The experience sure helped my typing! It also made me learn the value of work, and gave me a chance to really learn to appreciate my mother. In addition, having the cast was an excuse to improve my basketball game. I was a decent player, but most comfortable with my right hand. But with the cast on I was forced to practice dribbling with my left hand, and now I can go either way. Finally, there was one other unexpected benefit. In art class, I was never very good. But one day, with my hand still in the cast, I tried drawing with my left hand. To my surprise, I was much better at it than before! The cast is long gone, but I still draw left-handed and am really quite good at it. Maybe I'd never have known about this ability if I hadn't made my obstacle into my opportunity. 6 Score Critique The essay is scored based on four basic criteria: Topic, Support, Organization, and Language. This essay demonstrates an especially strong grasp of the writing assignment, earning especially high points for Topic, Support, and Organization. The author states a thesis in paragraph 1, provides several specific, relevant examples of 4 Score Essay To say that every obstacle can be turned into an opportunity is to be an optimist. Some people just always look on the bright side, and are able to overcome there obstacles. Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz is stranded by the tornado and can't go home. So instead of just sitting there, she takes the opportunity to make friends with Scarecrow and others, and to rid the world of wicked witches. Her optimism wins her the right to go back to Kansas. In the real world, Marie Curie was told women couldn't be scientists. But she was optimistic and persevered and discovered radium. Now there are more women scientists than ever. Ophelia in Hamlet however, is not an optimist. She and Hamlet fall in love but then he pushes her away. She doesn't understand why and kills herself. I like to think I'm an optimist too. If somebody tells me I can't do something, I just try harder until I can. Take field hockey: I went out as a freshman and barely made the team, but worked and worked and this year was a starter on the varsity. We came in second in the league. Life is like that if you look on the bright side. Don't get discouraged. Every cloud has a silver lining. So if you are an optimist, every obstacle is an opportunity. 4 Score Critique The essay is scored based on four basic criteria: Topic, Support, Organization, and Language. This author attempted with some success to fulfill the assignment. She gives some relevant examples from literature and history that work well with the prompt. But her examples are a bit underdeveloped and confused. The essay is too short to develop its ideas well. The author should explain more how the obstacles she mentions became opportunities for the individuals in question. Also, she could have left out the example about Ophelia, which does not really fit with the essay.
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