The Universal Language of Freemasonry - ArchiMeD - Johannes ...

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Chapter 9 - Masonic and Anti-Masonic Literature
Pretty Soft
We recently heard a Junior Warden described as 'the pillow of
Beauty.' 1895
There exists a report on a Junior Deacon getting the Masonic formula wrong
that the Tyler is stationed "outside the door with a drawn sword in his hand": "M.
W. Bro. Donald Gardner, a Maine Past Grand Master, tells of visiting a Lodge
where a nervous Junior Deacon announced that the Tyler was 'outside the sword
with a drawn door in his hand.' " 1896
Another slip of the tongue was made by a nervous Tyler who had to
announce the arrival of the Grand Master, and announced the arrival of the
"Great Architect of the Universe" instead - which means God! This incident was
reported by Henry Clausen, Past Grand Master of California. 1897
Finally, there is a joke on the Masonic saying that the Tyler guards the lodge
against "cowans and eavesdroppers":
Buck Fever
It was the first meeting after installation. The junior deacon had just
been advanced from senior steward. It was his first time to officiate in
that place. To add to the feeling of buck fever, the district deputy was
present. In closing the master asked regarding the duties of the tiler.
He was told, 'To guard against the approach of Evens and
Cowsdroppers.' 1898
Jokes on Masonic customs
We will introduce this section with a joke on Masonic abbreviations. As we
remember from our chapter 7.1.3. on the ritual of the Royal Arch Degree, the
secret letters written in a circle around the keystone are H.T.W.S.S.T.K.S.,
meaning "Hiram the Widow's Son Sent to King Solomon." People who want to
make fun of the Masonic predilection of abbreviating too much have paraphrased
the letters K.S.H.T.W.S.S.T. as follows: "King Solomon had 20 wives, some say
30." 1899
The next joke deals with the Masonic tradition of advancing in a prescribed
and special series of steps. When the Entered Apprentice, for example,
approaches the East "in due and ancient form," 1900 he obeys different steps than
the Fellow Craft or the Master Mason, as we have seen in our chapter 4.9. The
setting of the following joke is a court where the defendant tries to impress the
1895 Pollard, p. 28.
1896 Pollard, p. 120.
1897 Cf. ibid, p. 119.
1898 Ibid, p. 84.
1899 Ibid, p. 83.
1900 Cf. Nizzardini, p. 54: the Entered Apprentice advances on his left foot, bringing the heel of his
right into the hollow of his left, thereby forming the angle of an oblong.