The Universal Language of Freemasonry - ArchiMeD - Johannes ...

Chapter 9 - Masonic and Anti-Masonic Literature 763
judge with hints to his being a Mason, with the hope of getting away without a
fine. However, he has to find out that the judge either is not a fellow Mason or
does not react to his attempt, whereas the policeman who conducts him away
turns out to be a Mason using a phrase quite similar to the Masonic formulas of
advancing with the left foot:
The judge who wasn't
A mason [sic] in court for a driving offence made many overtones to the
judge but all to no avail. He received a fine and an endorsement on his
driving licence. 'The judge didn't understand anything,' said the mason
[sic] to the policeman standing with him in the dock. 'Some of them
never will,' said the policeman. 'Never mind, move along now, off with
your left foot.' 1901
The joke below deals with the antithesis of operative masonry and
speculative Masonry. It makes fun of the metaphor "doing the working tools,"
which means to go to the lodge. A foreman of stonemasons tries to secure the
picks because he has overheard a Masonic workman say that he "will do the
working tools." The foreman does not understand this technical expression and
thinks the worker wants to steal the tools:
Safety of the tools
The foreman on the building site took all the picks and shovels after the
day's work and tried to place them for safety in the nearest bank.
'Whatever for!' asked a surprised bank teller. 'Well,' said the foreman, 'I
heard one of our bricklayers say he's going to do the working tools
tonight.' 1902
The next joke is very interesting since it employs technical terms from the
field of stonemasonry in connection with the working tools. A policeman
describes how he can deal with drunks "Masonically": he "proves horizontals,"
"adjusts uprights," and "fixes them on their bases," after which all "part in
harmony." The latter formula is often used in Masonic and other fraternal closing
ceremonies. It is similar to the Masonic saying, "to meet upon the level, and to
part upon the square." The fictive language of Freemasonry creates the image of
workmen erecting a spiritual temple according to the Master's (God's) plans
designed on the tracing board. The Masons thus in a sense prove horizontals and
adjust uprights, with the help of their working tools: the square teaches them
morality; the level, equality; and the plumb, rectitude.
Prove horizontals
A policeman and freemason [sic] was asked how he could do his duty
and observe masonic [sic] teachings. 'Oh, quite simply,' he said.
1901 Buchanan, p. 19. Bold print added.
1902 Ibid, p. 23. Bold print added.